Author's note: This is a retelling of Mercury and the Woodman from Aesop (Winter) Part B. The Aesop is a collection of short children's stories that are all followed by a lesson to be learned. The purpose of the story is to show that honesty is the best policy. Mercury is the God of merchants and in the originally story a Woodman ask him to return an axe he has lost in a river. In my story I changed the characters to Sancus, the God of honesty, and Dog. Both the Dog and the Woodman loose something, and are rewarded by their honesty.
(Dog and the Bone: by Creative Commons)
"I will do anything for you to return my bone Sancus."
"No fear Dog, I shall return you your bone from the depths of the river."
Sancus dived into the river and pulled out a gold bone.
"Is this your bone Dog?"
"No it is not, I cannot claim such a fine bone."
Sancus set the bone at the dog's paws and dived back into the river. Sancus pulled out a silver bone.
"Is this your bone Dog?"
"No it is not, I cannot claim such a fine bone."
Again Sancus set the bone at the dog's paws and dived back into the river. Sancus pulled out the dog's bone.
"Is this your bone Dog?"
"Yes Sancus, thank you so much, I am forever grateful."
The Dog picked up the bone and began to walk away.
"Dog, please take all three bones. It is a gift for your honesty."
"Thank you Sancus, I do not deserve them, but I shall do as you say and be infinitely grateful"
The Dog went back under the big shady tree with his three bones. Several other dogs passed the Dog and asked where he found such fine bones.
The Dog would respond to every dog the same. "I was gifted these bones by Sancus when I dropped my old bone in the river."
Many dogs went to the river that day and dropped their bones in the river. There whined and howled to Sancus. Sancus heard these whines and howls and emerged over the river.
"Great Sancus, I will do anything to have by bone back"
"No fear, I shall return your bone from the depths of the river"
Sancus would dive into the river and pull out the gold bone. He would ask if this was their bone and they would confirm it was indeed.
"This is no bone of yours, you lie and have broken my trust."
Sancus would then disappear again and again and take the gold bone. He never returned any bone from the many dogs. All the dogs passed by the Dog's large shade tree empty handed and filled with anger and sadness.
Always be honest
Bibliography:
The Aesop For Children: Winter, translated by unknown, located from UN-Textbook.
Hi Camille. Great job on creating an interesting story! You did a really good job creating a back and forth dialogue that was easy to follow. This made me feel like I could really hear the characters talking to each other. I also thought that changing the main character to a dog was a really unique idea, because if animals can understand the idea of honesty, then so should humans. I also read with the original story, and both for it and yours, I wonder how and why Sancus (or Mercury in the original) are able to hang around in the woods. Maybe you could incorporate some sort of backstory for Sancus that better explains why he is in the woods. Lastly, what if you did a followup on the dog after they received all of the bones? It would be interesting to see even a small look into the future of the main character.
ReplyDeleteHello, Camille!
ReplyDeleteI loved this story! I felt like I was actually reading a true old mythology story. You did a really good job at capturing an audiences attention! I truly enjoyed how you made a change to the original story to include the dog character, I think that would really make this story more relatable to children. I didn't really understand how Sancus could pull out so many gold bones, I think if you explained that he formed these bones to trick the other dogs or maybe told a little story about how the gold bones came from other dogs that had passed away that would explain the situation better. I think it would be really fun if you included a part about why the original dog that loses his bone is so honest. If you had an origin story about that dog was raised by his owner or his mother to tell the truth I think that would be really cute. Overall, I really enjoyed this story and look forward to reading more from you!
-Sam
Hi Camille! I really liked your story. I love dogs, so I'm a bit of a sucker for stories that feature dogs as characters :) I thought this was really unique, and I love the lesson! It reminds me of another fable (by Aesop, I believe) in which a dog sees his reflection in a pond while carrying a bone. He thinks the bone in the reflection is bigger, so he drops his and tries to get the other bone. Of course, he ended up with no bone. Sounds like the other dogs in your story who lied about the gold bone!
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