Mom,
It has felt like such a long time since I have had the chance to write you. I think the last time was Lightning's first birthday. I miss you lots and I know Lightning does as well. He has been so erratic and hot headed lately. Every time I sit to write you he storms in and throws a tantrum....and you simply can't ignore his tantrums. I write to you to ask advice. Let me start from the beginning.
Lightning was a fairly noisy baby, but he never hurt anyone. When I was on top of feeding him and putting him to bed he was a baby sent from the heavens. He was happy and would smile. He never fussed or cried. When he started teething nothing.....and I mean NOTHING...would calm him down. When he would get fired up, he shocked anyone around him. He even caught the crib on fire. I figured over time he would learn to control his tantrums. Mom...I was so wrong. Now he can talk back, storm off, and really do some damage. The kid is only two and the whole town is scared. The major offered me a house on the edge of town for Lightning and I to stay. He offered it in hopes that the extra couple miles would keep Lightning at bay. Lightning ended up getting so upset about the move he burned the major's house to a crisp. I included a picture of him destroying a tree earlier today.
(Lighting Hitting a Tree: caught by Creative Commons)
Everyone is telling me to get him under control, but even if I yell all night he won't stop. I think the major is going to send us away soon. Lightning and I can always go back to the sky and stay with his dad, Cloud. Cloud and I wanted him to have a normal childhood though. Plus, even if we are up in the sky...he is still just as dangerous. I wish I knew what to do. Please give me any advice you can.
Love you mom
-Thunder
Nigerian Folk Stories by Elphinstone Dayrell . Website: Mythology and Folklore UN-Textbook
Hi Camille!
ReplyDeleteI love how you chose to write this piece. A letter is a great idea for Thunder writing to her mom, and in this situation it seems like a very reasonable course of action for her to take. It really personifies Thunder because this is such a human thing to do (ask a mom for help). I love the wordplay you use, too ("he storms in", "fired up", etc.). It gives a great visual and works so well in the context! Great job!
Hi Camille,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great concept!
This feels so normal, and so real (but for the fire and the names, of course), that in many ways it makes me feel so much more for Thunder than even the original story. It just seems like a letter someone from “next door,” so to speak, and that makes it just hit close to home.
Best,
A.M.
Hey Camille! I love the concept of this story. I've always been a fan of stories told in an epistolary format, and I think this story was perfect to be framed as a letter from daughter to mother. It made me wonder, who is her mom? Who gave birth to Thunder -- maybe Rain? Storm? It'd be so cool to see a follow-up letter from the mom back to Thunder. Awesome story!
ReplyDeleteHi Camille!
ReplyDeleteI adore the way that you framed this as a letter from one mother to her own mother, asking for advice. It really makes me feel for this poor mother struggling to keep her kid in check. What a fantastic way to keep the reader engaged and tug on their heartstrings a little bit. Overall, awesome job here!